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ME3 Predictions

Calibrations Comic
Mass Effect 3 will be here soon, but it's never too late for baseless predictions! The following is a list of my spot-on predictions about BioWare's conclusion to the epic trilogy.

Warning: As I am totally the next Nostradamus, this blog contains major spoilers for a game that hasn't been released yet. Don't say I didn't warn you.


  • The council will continue to dismiss any claims that the Reapers exist, even whilst they kill them.
  • The Rachni Queen will make you regret your decision to save her.
  • You get a pet Thresher Maw.
  • The elevators will make a comeback.
  • Harbinger will assume direct control approximately 9,967 more times.
  • The geth will infiltrate.
  • Shepard and Wrex will engage in an epic name shouting contest.
  • Mordin will preform an encore.
  • Probing Uranus will still be funny.
  • You will get to punch an annoying reporter (again).
  • You will get an Elcor biotic as a squad mate.
  • If Shepard dies in Mass Effect 2, Joker will become the main playable character.
  • Miranda's rear end will implode.
  • Despite being the only hope for all life in known existence, half of the galaxy will still want you dead.
  • Every civilisation and race you encounter will force you to do something they deem to be of much higher importance than saving all life in the omniverse.
  • Garrus will decline Shepard's offer to help defeat the Reapers, citing the need to finish some calibrations first.
  • We will either never get to see Tali's face, or it will be very ugly. Prepare for disapointment.
  • Resource gathering will continue to get even more boring.
  • Wrex will unveil his master to plan to stop the Reapers: eating them.
  • Joker and EDI will get married in the end.

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